The world's 5 weirdest coffees

March 21, 2018

If you think the coffee from your office vending machine is weird, think again.

We've found five of the weirdest coffees on the planet, all of which are genuine and on sale right now.

You might want to finish that cup before you read on...

Monkey spit coffee

No, it's not just a hipster name, it's actually coffee beans that have been chewed up and gobbed out by monkeys. But there is some method in this monkey madness. You see, the macaques of Chikmagalur, India, can spot a particularly ripe coffee fruit. They snaffle them all up, but spit out the bean in the middle – this is the bit we use to make coffee. The enzimes in the monkey gob have already started to break down the bean, giving a distinct flavour. Possibly of bananas.

Taco flavoured coffee

Now, we like coffee and we love tacos, but taco flavoured coffee? It's the creation of CoffeeAM, who sell a whole bunch of other flavours, including maple bacon, peanut butter and pecan pie. Yes, they are American. How did you guess?

Bird dropping coffee

We've all heard of the weasel shit coffee, or the coffee that has passed through the digestive system of a civet, but here's a new one to us: Jacu bird coffee. The Jacu is a bird, a bit like a turkey, native to Brazil. Like the Indian monkeys mentioned earlier, they love to gobble up coffee fruit, but they don't spit the beans out. No, sir. The beans come out the other end, having been stripped of any bitterness and, apparently, without the 'manure' flavouring imparted by the civet. Delicious.

Charcoal coffee

Adding charcoal to food is ultra-hip right now. It's on peng, or something. From toothpaste to burger buns, it seems black is the new, um, black. But the good people of Indonesia were adding charcoal to their coffee before it was cool. Want to make it at home? (please don't) Simply make a black coffee, then drop a red hot lump of coal in it. Wait a minute, then remove the charcoal and drink it up. Easy. It's said to cure stomach aches. We imagine it also makes washing up a bit of a bugger.

Yak butter coffee

We imagine there's not a lot to do in Tibet: Look at the mountains, walk in the mountains, be oppressed by China, look at the mountains again. Those long winter nights must really drag. That's probably when someone decided to make a cup of coffee with yak butter and salt. Yak butter? More like yuck butter, ammiright, huh? Those who have tried it say it provides much needed energy for climbing all those ruddy mountains.